The Visible Abs of Unhappiness


The Visible Abs of Unhappiness

jo butler

In my last post ‘Reaching Your Happy Number’  I talked about how you almost always can never reach your Happy Number.  You may strive to reach a certain weight on the scales but when you eventually get there, you find that it actually doesn’t make you that happy.

I see this happen all the time.  A client has a set amount of weight they’d like to lose or they’d like to reach a certain weight because that was what they weighed when…………


The trouble with that is, that when they get there, its never enough. They still think there’s just a couple more kilos or that they just don’t look the same as they did last time they were at this weight.  What gives??

Well, you could actually be right about the fact that you don’t look the same.  Your body changes over time.  You may have had children, aged and/or lost or gained muscle weight.  These will all effect how you ‘look’ and ‘feel’ at a given weight.  So when you ‘used to’ weight 65kg and you felt/looked great, weighing that now may be totally different.  It all depends what you were doing then, were you active, were you fit, how old were you and what was your training history-if any??

The other ‘Happy Numbers’ that clients often shoot for are something like a ‘6-pack’ or a certain chest or hip measurement as a couple of examples.

These turn out to be exactly the same.  You think everything is going to be perfect when you reach that elusive goal, but it turns out that everything isn’t perfect.  You still have the same job, the same financial status, the same routine, the same everything and you’re not magically happy just because you can see your abs.

So while goals are super important (I set them to get myself motivated often-small and big) its more important to appreciate the journey.

  • Appreciate and focus on the effort you’re putting in to reach your goals
  • While you cannot really control the outcome, you can control the input and effort you make.  Make the most of this
  • Enjoy and appreciate the journey.  The pushing hard, the sacrifice and the effort are all what makes you and your journey special.  Focus on that effort and value what you’re doing each and every day
  • Its like in a running race.  You cannot control the opposition.  You can only control your own effort and output.  You can only do YOUR BEST without ever being in control of the eventual winner.  And just like in a race, you can be proud of YOUR BEST EFFORT.  Put in an effort worth being proud of every day

Rather than always focusing on the big goals, set yourself daily and weekly targets to meet.  Things I get clients to focus on when on the journey to body composition change are process goals such as; drinking enough water each day, training a certain number of times per week, including healthy fats each day in their meals, taking supplements daily, choosing certain types of food.


These individual steps all come together to get them to their big goals.  Set similar process goals and reward yourself every day by appreciating what you have achieved every single day rather than just focusing on that 6 pack all the time.

Stop focusing on those Happy Numbers solely, because the world will not be perfect when  you reach them.  No one else cares if you weigh 63.2kg, but if you’re setting an awesome example of commitment and effort every day to your kids, family and friends, that will make you happy.

Stop judging yourself  by your waist or body weight measurement.  You are judged on your actions.  So make those actions worthy both in your journey to achieve your physical goals and also in every part of your life.

If you need help setting those process goals, or in staying accountable to them, let me know.  I’m happy to help at any time.

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